I have anxiety probs, y’all. I don’t know what my deal is, but I sometimes just can’t bring myself to chill. The seemingly littlest thing can trigger my anxiety and before I know it I’m all shallow breaths, tension headaches, and negative vibes.
What’s the dill, pickle???
I guess we each have our own vices, and this is just one of mine. But sometimes I wish we could just magically wish them away, you know?
Since we can’t, however, we are left to figure them out and face them head on. Which is what I’m trying to do.
I wonder if I’ll ever get better at this anxiety thing. Though I’ve figured out how to gain moments of peace, those moments only last so long before the next bout of anxiety fills the gap.
For me personally, the most frustrating thing about my anxiety is that it doesn’t always feel that founded. Some of my anxieties are super legitimate, while others are so odd and don’t deserve the amount of energy I’m putting out towards them.
Why am I sharing this? No particular reason other than that it is extremely cathartic to get real about my issues with the world wide web. Maybe it’s the barrier of my screen that I feel protected by, or maybe it’s that I don’t have to look a person in the eyes while admitting my failures. Either way, it’s nice to just state my problems and sometimes let them be. Hold space for them.
As an extremely intense personality it’s in my nature to always push myself past hurtles as quickly as I can, but I’ve recognized that sometimes that doesn’t always work the way I intend. So, instead I’m just going to let them be what they are for now, and face them moment by moment.
But in between each of said moments I’m going to take it easy on myself, pour myself a cup of coffee and kick up my heels while my struggles hang out around me. Kind of like kicking back in a messy house while nomming on some ‘za and watching Netflix.
Ya feel me?