I was insecure when first putting on this outfit. In truth I loved it, was inspired by it, but was afraid of being judged for wearing it. People can be so harsh and so unwilling to open their minds to other perspectives than their own sometimes. Which was why I was afraid to wear it.
I’m a huge fan of gender bender/gender fluid fashion. There is something so powerful about breaking the societal constructs that box in people’s self expression (i.e. pants = masculinity, skirts = femininity etc.). But when I’ve tried to rock more unisex styles in the past, I’ve heard some not so kind things come out of people’s mouths because of it. So naturally I was afraid of being judged again.
In light of this I’m sad to say that truthfully I’ve made the same mistakes myself. I’ve made snap judgements about others. I guess we all do at times. So, when does the judging end? I don’t think the response should be angry reactions (which will beget angrier reactions), but more loving personal stands for one’s own beliefs, that also remain entirely respectful and kind to every other human being, because what goes around comes around, right? That reminds me of that adage, “be the change you wish to see in the world.”
So, if I want people to stop telling me I’m boyish because I have short hair, or I’m less sexy or beautiful because I’m wearing men’s clothing, I need to refrain from judging anything about them at all. I believe showing true kindness and love, despite how another person chooses to treat us, will really possibly make the world a better place.
I hope to see more people being their own, wonderful, glorious, unique selves. I hope they break out of the grey molds they have been put into and embrace their own unique perspectives and expressions.
Hear me: What one wears is not evidence for labels that we as a society have become regretfully obsessed with, but rather serves as a way to express oneself and say, “I can wear whatever I want because I am who I am despite what I wear. Clothing does not define me — I do.”
So, here I am in my Harajuku/90s inspired gender bender outfit. I hope you too find the strength in you to be yourself and explore your own ideas and thinking. To share your heart and mind and to not make apologies for the things that make you most beautifully you.
Here’s to changing the world one outfit at a time 😉