Get a load of this jacket! Can someone say, DIVINE? I’m obsessed with it. Completely obsessed. And I know I say I’m obsessed with a lot of clothes or shoes, but this one is extra obsession worthy! When I first got it I felt a little cautious as to how to wear it in such a way that looked good. But after a few wears I’m pretty sure you can’t mess this one up. It looks luxe with a dress and heels, sumptuously 70s with boots and flared jeans, and even looks cute with sneakers and activewear. I think it’s the 8th wonder of the world! What can’t this jacket do???
But the one negative about this jacket is that I got it last month when I shouldn’t have. It was Christmas time, we had already spent plenty on gifts, but I ended up getting it anyway because I just had to have it.
I’m bad with money, you guys. Like, terrible with money. It’s not that I can’t save, but I just don’t keep a budget. I see all those numbers and I get so overwhelmed. The line by line detail stuff makes my bones hurt. I don’t know why I despise it so much, I just do.
Add to that a genuine lack of knowledge on financial stuff which inevitably leaves me feeling super insecure, and therefore afraid to even ask someone to explain stuff to me for fear of being judged for not knowing these things already as a grown ass woman.
And fear, let’s talk about it. I get so afraid of money and the details surrounding money (like what if I run out, or what if I spent it on stupid stuff, or what about random expenditures that I can’t even figure out what they are) that I avoid it all the more. It’s like my bank account is some dark chasm of terror that gapes at me from the corner of my mind, and I just can’t work up the nerve to go inside and turn on the lights.
Something that I think irritates me about all this is how many times someone has tried to simplify this subject for me in a way that is totally unhelpful. “Read Total Money Makeover. It’ll fix your issues,” they say. Or, “Just do a cash only system. That’s the only thing that works.” Well y’all, I read the book and I still have these issues with money. I tried going cash only, but c’mon! In this age? Most of what we pay for now is online.
The only thing that gives me hope is that though I’ve sucked royally at managing money for a long, long time, I have shown myself to grow in similar areas just by continuing to try different systems over and over until finding what works. And I think this is how it is in life, no?
It’s like when you meet someone who is a CrossFit enthusiast that says they didn’t make health a priority until they joined a class, but you tried it and since you literally loath group exercise classes, it didn’t have the same effect. And the gym didn’t work for you, and trying to train for a marathon didn’t work. But maybe one day you found a yoga video on YouTube and you’ve been a regular yoga practicer ever since.
Or maybe you know someone who gets the most amount of work done super early in the morning so you try it and that system fails you. But one day you find really late nights are magically productive for you.
Or maybe this is all wishful thinking on my part. But I’m hoping I can find a way to get to know my finances, get flirtatious, go on some dates, and perhaps settle down with them. I want to know them and be comfortable with them and I want those fears, insecurities, and aversions to be laid to rest.
Anyway, hi! I’m a terrible money manager, but look at my jacket! Isn’t it divine?!
-Faux Fur Jacket (here) — Leith
-Grey Tank Bodysuit (similar option here) — Treasure&Bond
-Leather Mules (here) — Seychelles